5 common networking mistakes (and how to avoid them)
Struggling with networking? Avoid these five common mistakes to make it easier, more natural, and more effective.
If you want to learn a new skill, the obvious first step is to take lessons.
Think about driving a car, speaking a new language, or playing a musical instrument - these are skills we typically learn with the guidance of a teacher.
Networking is different.
While it plays a crucial role in our career - helping us connect with potential employers, peers, and mentors - it’s a skill most of us aren’t formally taught.
Yes, networking classes exist. But most people skip the lessons and instead learn through trial and error.
And that trial-and-error approach can make networking feel awkward, even intimidating. But it doesn't have to. It can be simple and effective. And a good place to begin when starting out is understanding what not to do.
Here, we reveal five common networking mistakes—and how to avoid them.
1. Being too transactional
Networking isn’t just about what you can get - it’s about building real, long-term relationships.
If you only reach out to someone when you need something, you won’t get far.
Picture this: there’s an opening at a company you’d love to work at. Who’s more likely to land the job? The person who’s spent months cultivating relationships with key people, making themselves known? Or the stranger who stumbles across the job post on LinkedIn and fires off a resumé?
Top tip: Make a list of five people at your dream companies. Start engaging with them online - comment on their posts, share relevant insights, and build the connection before you ever need to ask for anything.
Or even better, look for opportunities to meet them in person. Are they talking at an event or presenting at a conference? Face-to-face meetings may feel a bit scary but they’ll make you even more memorable.
2. Not adding value
If you’re always taking and never giving, people will quickly lose interest. Successful networking relies on both parties feeling as though the relationship will benefit them, not a “What's in it for me mindset?”
Before entering a networking situation, it’s worth having a few ideas up your sleeve about how you can help people.
Perhaps you’ve been to a conference recently and can share some key insights? Or maybe you can introduce them to someone in your network, or even offer support in an area you excel in?
Don’t forget: non-work related benefits count too. You could share book, TV or podcast recommendations or discuss hobbies you enjoy. This could lead to a deeper personal connection.
3. Failing to follow up
Whether you’re networking in person or online, a great conversation means nothing if you don’t stay in touch.
You may have had an amazing chat with someone and walked away buzzing about your new connection. But that person may have spoken to 10—even 20—new people that day. Even if you clicked, you can’t guarantee they’ll remember you.
If you met online, standing out is even harder—it’s tough to build real connections over Zoom or Teams. Face-to-face meetings feel more personal and memorable, while online interactions can easily blur together.
The answer is: follow up.
In practice, that could mean:
- Sending a personalized email soon after saying how much you enjoyed meeting them and how you’d love to keep the conversation going.
- Sending a connection request on LinkedIn with a short note reminding them who you are and what you chatted about.
- Sharing an article or resource connected to something you discussed. Remember, it doesn't have to be work-related. For example, if you’d talked about cricket, you could drop them the link to a cricket podcast you like.
- Engage with their social media, such as liking or commenting on their posts. This keeps you visible and shows that you’re genuinely interested in what they’re sharing.
The important thing is to keep connections alive. If necessary, carve out time in your diary every week or month, dedicated to cultivating relationships. Make it one of your non-negotiables.
4. Spreading yourself too thin
Gathering too many contacts has diminishing returns. You can apply the Pareto Principle to networking: that is 80% of your results come from 20% of your connections. This rule emphasizes quality over quantity.
You might think having a huge contact book equals a big network. But in reality, most opportunities will come from nurturing deeper, personal relationships with a smaller portion of your network.
It’s important to spend some of your time making new connections. But the real value comes from building deeper relationships. That's where you should focus the majority of your energy.
5. Forgetting about online
As mentioned above, online networking can be challenging. When you meet someone face-to-face, it’s easier to have a natural conversation and build genuine rapport. Online, you’re often reduced to just an email address or social media profile.
But it’s important not to dismiss online networking entirely—it has plenty of advantages:
- Cost-effective – there’s no need for travel, accommodation, and event fees, making it more affordable than attending in-person events.
- Convenient – you can network from anywhere, whether you're at home, in a coffee shop, or at the office. There’s no need to plan trips or carve out large blocks of time.
- Quick – you can make initial connections faster, whether it's via email, social media, or a virtual event.
- Efficient – you can filter connections based on specific criteria like industry, role, or expertise, making your efforts more targeted.
- Global reach – you can connect with people from all over the world and connect with people who may not have been accessible in person.
- Flexible timing – you can network at times that work for you, without worrying about time zone constraints or scheduling conflicts.
A great compromise is to schedule Zoom coffees or join online networking groups. These allow you to connect face-to-face, without having to travel.
Slow and steady wins the race
The key is remembering that networking is a marathon, not a sprint.
Don’t wait until you’re job hunting or need to raise your profile to start making connections.
The best results come from building relationships over time.
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